How To Cope With Depression

How To Cope With Depression

Almost half of us will suffer from depression at some point in our lives, but the condition remains badly misunderstood and therefore often poorly treated. At the heart of our collective difficulty with depression is a confusion about what it actually is – and in particular, how it can be distinguished from a state all …

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Why Are We so Easily ‘triggered’?

Why Are We so Easily ‘triggered’?

If we were totally sane, we would respond to the present only on its own terms; we would worry or be angered or give way to anxiety only as much as the circumstances before us actually dictated. But we are not – of course – most of us quite sane, as evidenced by the way …

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Daddy Issues

Daddy Issues

To say that someone has ‘daddy issues’ is a somewhat rude and humiliating way of alluding to a very understandable longing: for a father who is strong and wise, who is judicious, kind, perhaps at points tough, but always fair – and ultimately, always on our side. It would be so understandable if we were …

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The Golden Child Syndrome

The Golden Child Syndrome

We are used to thinking of many of the psychological problems of adulthood as stemming from a lack of adequate love in our early years. We grow mentally unwell – prey to underconfidence, anxiety, paranoia and shame – because, somewhere in the past, we were denied the necessary warmth, care and sympathy. But there is …

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What Your Home Says About You…

What Your Home Says About You…

One of the most important and meaningful activities we are ever engaged in is the creation of a home. Over a number of years, typically with a lot of thought and considerable dedication, we assemble furniture, crockery, pictures, rugs, cushions, vases, sideboards, taps, door handles and so on into a distinctive constellation we anoint with …

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How Emotionally Healthy Are You?

How Emotionally Healthy Are You?

One of assessing how emotionally damaged we might be is to identify a range of markers of emotional health and imagine how we fare in relation to them. At least four central themes suggest themselves. Firstly Self-Love. Self-love is the quality that determines how much we can be friends with ourselves and, day to day, …

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On Feeling Depressed

On Feeling Depressed

We’re not talking about the extreme, most paralysing, regions of despair – where external medical help is vital. Our target is rather the times when we feel – as indicated by Thoreau’s phrase – mired in moods of ‘quiet desperation’: a large, grey hinterland in which beneath an outward surface of endurance, we feel exhausted, …

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